Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for always being the guide. I certainly couldn’t have done it without all of you. Some day I’ll make all of you proud, knowing I’ve never done anything that remarkable so far. Love you guys to death.
I’m sorry I let you take the bait and leaving you there hanging. I’m sorry if I gave you hope. I’m sorry I couldn’t let you in. I’m sorry if you believed in me, only to find out that there’s nothing for you at the end of the rainbow. I’m sorry for the disappointment.
It’s the 31st, the last day of this year.
I still haven’t forgotten you, I’m still here always.
I did it out of protection, but you never understood that, no matter how many times you said you did.
I admit, 2011 was a rollercoaster ride (which I reluctantly sat on) for me. However, I must say the ride was pretty thrilling…. well, maybe refreshing would be a better word. There were times I felt like I was on top of the world, at the top of my game and there were times where I found myself lying in the gutter, helpless and hopeless.
2011 was bitter sweet I must say.
We’re left with a few more days till 2012 comes rushing in. I’m left with a few more days to let those feelings and thoughts that I kept for so long, out. I’d like to start the new year, fresh, rid of all the bad memories so they won’t haunt my conscience. Okay… (maybe I’m thinking too much, way too much into this).
But I’d like a clear conscience, a calm mind, and a clean slate.
I believe that faith is in the hands of an individual himself, his dealings between God and him alone. No one should not, and I repeat, should not question another’s faith in God. Religion, is simple to understand, till one wrong judgement makes it a whole new complicated subject. Race does not matter once religion is questioned, I believe. An Indian could be a Catholic, a Chinese could be Muslim, a Malay could be a Christian (though highly unlikely in Singapore, but you get my point right?)
I may be Eurasian, but that does not make me less or disadvantaged of the religion I was born into, Islam. Yes, I celebrate Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Aidiladha and fast, these are all out of faith and the beliefs I have in my religion. On my dad’s side, I wish my cousins Merry Christmas every 25th of the last month, go to the church to visit the niches of my late relatives and catch up with the family over Christmas dinners, all out of respect. I have respect and tolerance for both the environments that I have been brought up in, but I only believe and have faith in in one.
The reason for this post is mainly to let my feelings out. Being the strong girl that I am, it does hurt sometimes when people question my faith in my religion. I may not be a perfect muslim girl, but I’m all for my religion.
I’ve been getting continuous formspring questions from anonymous people asking about me and my religion, labelling me as a disbeliever, which is a sin to my religion. I am definitely not a disbeliever, I think I know myself better than anyone else out there. I don’t really know what’s your motive in labelling me sumn I’m not, telling me what I should and should not do, telling me what’s right and what’s wrong. Please, I have parents to do that job for me, and don’t worry they’re doing a pre swell job.
Maybe all I’m tryna say is, before you point out someone else’s flaws, telling them they’re wrong and making them feel so bad about themselves, try looking in the mirror. All humans were created the same, what makes you think you are in the position to make them feel so small, so different from anyone else?
Kalau celebrate christmas tu maknenye dah murtad kan -.-
Since this is in a mix of English and Malay, I’ll answer it the same way. Kalau aku celebrate pun kau punye pasal pe? To set things straight, I just go to the church to pay respects to my late relatives and visit my cousins on Christmas, all out of respect and familial ties. I didn’t know being respectful made me murtad. You don’t know my family, what we do is not your problem anyway. Don’t go around telling people what they are, they definitely know themselves better than you, thanks.